How we celebrate Christmas became an important discussion my husband when our daughter was born. The Santa question was one we had to discuss, along with other issues that are common in today’s society.
We choose to not get wrapped up in materialism – this means Christmas without Santa, Elf on a Shelf, or truck loads of presents. It means a Christmas where we focus on our family, our faith, and our time away from the rest of the world.
** Please note that this post was originally written in 2013. We have since Stopped celebrating Christmas, but because many people are in many different places to make decisions that are right for their family, I am leaving it up.
It’s a time to connect and spend time together.
And while our stance has gotten harder over the years as the world tries to creep in and our kids are exposed to more at school and gain more friends, it’s still something we stand by.
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While I originally thought about bashing Santa, this post turned into something more; it’s a inward reflection of our family’s intentions at the Holidays. While sometimes, I do have a plea to kill Santa Claus, I also have a plea to focus on the greater meaning of Christmas and of the holiday season in general.
And honestly, we have never hated on Santa even though in some ways I really hate the concept. We simply teach that reindeer don’t fly and focus on history… but I am getting ahead of myself.
How we Celebrate Christmas as Christians in a modern world.
We Celebrate Christ
Some would argue that Christmas is a Pagan holiday and that Christians shouldn’t even celebrate it. However, my belief is that it does not matter when Christ’s birth is celebrated. The idea is that as a family we have time to worship and honor the birth of our savior. The amazing gift that our Heavenly Father has given us, His Son, is worth remembering even if it does not correlate to an exact date.
We put up a Christmas tree & a Nail
As the tree points heavenward, we are reminded of Christ’s arrival. The star at the top reminds us of the miraculous star that God and His angels gave the shepherds and wise men to follow. We read the story of Christ’s birth and the story of the wise men bringing gifts as we prepare to decorate the tree.
Not only is it noteworthy to celebrate the arrival of Christ, but also to remember His death and resurrection. If it was not for the tree that is the Cross, we would not have eternal life. We spend time discussing the second tree that is important in the life of Christ and hang a hidden nail on the interior of the tree.
Serving Others & History Lessons
As a history teacher, I can relate to teaching my children historical stories. There is value in studying past events and cultures from around the world. As St. Nick is a historical character, we are more than willing to educate our children about his good deeds and his story.
In fact, my husband and I discussed how the real St. Nick might feel about his commercialization and secular agenda in today’s world. I feel like he would not feel so honored to know that his intent and message is warped into something completely different today.
We have our stockings hung at the fireplace and read the story of St. Nick to then discuss the good deeds we can do for others and the true historic accounts of who the Real Nicholas really was. We are blessed with so much, while many struggle. What better time to go out and help others than during the holidays?
We have had to deal with the backlash of not doing Santa. So if this is you, learn how to deal with your child telling other kids Santa isn’t real.
Making Memories & Quality Time
Whether it is making delicious snacks together in the kitchen or just going out as a family and banning all distractions, we spend time together. It’s so easy to take family for granted. And with time off from work and school, there is not better time to capitalize on spending that time wisely. We love movies and getting outside together and there are days for both.
Despite difficulties, we have always found ways to treasure one another. From the winter we spent without a shovel, to Christmas in a new home without food or a working oven. We find the beauty in the madness and value the time with each other. We love to put together puzzles and just spend quality time together.
Odds and Ends Decorations
We only have one small box of Christmas decorations and the tree. We don’t go all-out and we like it that way. It means we’re not buying a ton of stuff that sits in storage for 11 months and it means we don’t get lost in the season. We have a small stake in the ground that says “Jesus is the greatest gift”, a wreath on the door, a Nativity Scene, and just a few other winter items up in the house.
We choose to buy any replacement decorations on clearance so that companies aren’t making more and we choose to be minimalists in our decor. Again, the holiday is about remembering our faith, focusing on our family, and serving others.
Related: Ways even toddlers can participate in Acts of Service.
A Few Gifts
Christmas is still a special time. It’s magical without flying reindeer and I choose to teach my children to be good year-round. But “goodness” is how a person benefits others and service to our fellow man. I don’t want my children to believe they are being rewarded with gifts for serving others, because that’s not the point at all. The point is that they do it because they are called to live that way.
We choose to limit gifts and buy sustainably. And while we’ve all heard the argument that “Jesus received three gifts”, that is what we have historically tried to do too. It not even that he got three gifts so that’s our model, it’s that we choose to not buy into consumerism and 3 is a small number and a good maximum. Too many times our society tends to worship possessions and that is not the message I want to send my children.
We revamped our gift-giving strategy over the years to create a 4-gift rule alternative that’s been very effective!
How we celebrate Christmas is a time to spend the Holidays without stressing. And though extended family is sometimes stressful for us, we get through everything together. We take trips to visit others and remember crazy Christmases past.
What’s your favorite way to spend Christmas? Do you participate in elvish games or Santa? Please share how your family enjoys Christmas!
Kara is an author and advocate for positive, grace-filled parenting. She is homeschooler to her 5 children living on a farm in New England. She believes in creative educational approaches to help kids dive deeper into a rich learning experience and has her degree in Secondary Education & Adolescent Childhood Development. She is passionate about connecting with and helping other parents on their journey to raise awesome kids!
justfordaisy
What a beautiful post Kara. Very similar to how we spend our Christmas too. It is estimated that Australians will spend over $30 billion this Christmas! That’s insane!!
We’re certainly not adding much to that dollar amount and love your sentiments in this post and see you share many of our values too! 🙂
Kara Carrero
Thank you Bek! That is an incredible amount of money. It really never ceases to amaze me how much money people spend each year when the greatest memories can be made without spending money. Thanks for stopping by and hope you have a Merry Christmas season! 🙂
Emma @ P is for Preschooler
Christmas to me is about family and traditions, and it sounds the same for you! We do Santa, but this year I’m also trying to bring more focus to doing things for others and adding more giving and sharing (something my preschooler needs work on!). This is a beautiful post!
Kara Carrero
That’s great! Children I think definitely remember the special times together best of all regardless of if Santa is involved. Growing up we focused a lot on family and traditions but still did Santa 🙂 Thanks for stopping by and have a Merry Christmas season!
Mary
We do the 3 gifts as well-but with themes! Gold-something you really want, Frankincense-something that will bring you closer to the Lord, and Myrrh-something you put on your body (clothes, lotion, etc)
Thaleia Maher (@Something2Offer)
Amen, sister! Love your explanation of how your celebrate and why. A few homeschool moms and I were just having the discussion and I was shocked to find out one of them does not celebrate Christmas at all!
Nanette
In my little family of two, we do not join in on the gift exchange(s). Although, we celebrate Father’s ultimate gift, HIS son, Jesus Christ. We will be giving “JESUS” to our family this Christmas, the greatest gift of all.
Gabriella
Good Girl
Cheri
This is great. Im looking to do the same thing but don’t know whether or not I should completely avoid santa movies and how to explain to a 2 1/2 year old that santa isn’t real. She has caught on that santa has something to do with Christmas. What’s something short and simple to say that we celebrate Jesus’s birthday and not santa clause without being insensitive?
Kara Carrero
We have never avoided Santa in movies just like we don’t avoid other cultures in other movies (Like we still enjoy Moana or Mulan, it just opens up discussion). We talk about how the magical version of Santa is based on St. Nick who gave gifts to children out of generosity and to celebrate the birth of Jesus. And we teach our kids to be givers and to give to others in this way.
Kasseek
I liked this post very much. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.
I grew up Catholic and was told as a child that Santa Claus existed. I remember asking my mom how Santa could know if I was bad or good and she told me that his elves were always watching me. I believed it, but rather than the belief being magical, I actually became afraid to shower or use the potty because I felt like something or someone was always watching.
Now that I am older, I wish my parents never lied to me about Santa existing because it was traumatizing enough that it did not make the “magical” element worth it.
Thankfully despite my upbringing, my parents were Saved in 2001 and I was Saved in 2002. My husband and I don’t tell our children Santa is real, but we do exchange gifts and make cookies together and celebrate the birth of JESUS and talk about St Nick as well in place of Santa.
Chloe
Wow this has really helped me know and want to celebrate the true meaning of Christmas. My church celebrates Hanukkah God dosent command that its up to us. He doesn’t like pagan festivals and I thought Christmas was? I just dont want my children caught up in it all but this gives me more motivation to make it more about Jesus 🙂
Amber
That’s cool that you’re trying but why not ditch the wreaths and the tree and just hang a star instead. I read st nick was after . He got his get up from a pagan deity. A pagan deity that was worshipped. So all those things are still pagan that u are doing this the fruit is bad of it. It’s not good to participate in any of the pagan rituals . Just hang a star and talk about Christ as best gift that’s ok but a tree and wreaths and st nick beforehand was a pagan deity. Look it up. God bless. Maybe try living like the Bible says. Look up messianic Christmas . Stop eating pork too and unclean foods and actually read your Bible and do nothing that is pagan.
Kara Carrero
This actually is a great comment to remind me to update the top of this post. I wrote it years ago but we haven’t celebrated Christmas for a few years now and we don’t eat pork and we DO live out the entire Bible. I just haven’t worked on my website in years so this is still here.