Embracing the simple life… learning to live without a dishwasher
A few years ago I ditched the idea of using our dish washer in order to escape more chemicals in our lives. I thought it was a great idea to get away from hot temperatures leeching toxins from the dish rack onto what I eat off of, a way to not use chemical detergents, and something I could feasibly do. It was idealistic. And despite my sheer hatred for dishes, I was “all in”. Then I had my first child. I couldn’t keep up with laundry, breastfeeding, clothing diapering, being a mom, and hand-washing dishes! So I stopped the charade, got over my fear of dishwasher toxins, and started embracing the convenience of loading it up and pushing a button for it to finish while I didn’t give it a second thought. Three years later, I am sitting in my old-school, second floor Boston apartment; and you guessed it, no dishwasher.
There was weeping in my soul when I knew we would be moving in and I would have to muster the strength to wrangle two small children and hand wash dishes each day. Waking up each morning to the mountain of dishes that awaited my bitter, joyless hands was very much a reality in our home. I even Googled if someone could come wash my dishes for me. And TaskRabbit has assured me that it is a real thing. But it would cost me no less than $50 per hour to have some sketchy man come into my home to scrub food off my plates.
My valiant efforts to detoxify my home were no match to the convenience of the great dishwasher machine. Eco-friendly living aside, I had found my sanity in using a dishwasher for three years with kids. So this new life in a new city and new home that failed to provide me with this luxury was almost devastating. I had a great-aunt that one time declared dishwashers were from the devil himself, but with two tiny kids, I could not see her sentiment. Even though it has been said that she felt that way because it took away family bonding time.
And now, as the months have gone by and I have started embracing a new way of life that 1,700 miles has offered me, I have learned so much about not having so many conveniences. Something about not having a dishwasher helps me realize just how simple life is without so many conveniences. The life that happens on the kitchen floor and that happens as you spend time together. It is simplicity that I took for granted, and still take for granted, when I have easy access to machines that will do all the work for me or someone I can pay to do these job I would prefer to delegate.
There is something strangely therapeutic about wearing an apron and dipping my hands into warm soapy water as I rinse away the grime from the day. And the conversations that happen as my oldest daughter and I have while we work are irreplaceable and something I would not have if I was automating or outsourcing chores. Or the times when I walk around the corner and she has pulled up a stool to “wash dishes” are memories I won’t forget.
It’s hard to miss those small moments when a phone can’t be involved or when you’re working together as a team to finish the job. In those times are the simple moments of laughter when water gets splashed and the sweet memories of watching my babies play together on the floor. But most of all it’s taking the time to slow down. We live in such a fast, convenient world, that we forget what simple and unsophisticated feels or looks like. And in my case, it looks a little bit like warm suds, in a cool kitchen, with laughing children at my feet.
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Kara is an author and advocate for positive, grace-filled parenting. She is homeschooler to her 6 children living on a farm in New England. She believes in creative educational approaches to help kids dive deeper into a rich learning experience and has her degree in Secondary Education & Adolescent Childhood Development. She is passionate about connecting with and helping other parents on their journey to raise awesome kids!
